34 Notes to Past Me

The last few years have been a doozy and I wanted to write a birthday post or rather a getting older post of all the things I never would have thought or did think for the same reason. The way my life has turned out so far- is full of many ups and downs and while that may be true for most it was not what I expected growing up. And the process in which getting older, taking on new responsibilities and growing in many ways never dawned on me it would be like this. I’m not fully sure how this post will turn out yet but I hope it makes you think and be thankful for your own life and having another year to live.

TO MY PAST SELF:

You never thought drug and alcohol addiction would be in your family.

You never knew there were so many “sides” to people and how they show them tells you who they are (tells you even more about yourself)

You never thought about having your own owned house

You never knew that religion wouldn’t be a part of your life but rather the alternatives and woo woo stuff would be your comfort (all while still hoping; He sees you and knows you)

You always thought you’d be close to your family

You never thought they’d turn their backs on you

You didn’t think about all the older generations that would be passed on by now and how life is so different without them now

You always thought you’d have kids by now

You never thought you’d change your mind about “_

You knew you’d graduate high school and college; and have a career so forth

You never thought you’d have a “church” wedding

You just imagined that being a housewife and mom looked so easy and was always all you wanted to do

You were not really one for travel but always thought you’d be more cultured by now

The private things people don’t talk about in relation to society and life (genealogy/affairs/records/deaths etc) have never been so mysterious.

You never thought the state of the world could be worse and we’d stay forever in 1999

World peace was just an idea but nothing bad would ever happen

You never imagined how into true crime and documentaries you’d be and how fascinating they all are no matter the topic

You never thought you’d have a room dedicated to legos

You always wanted your OWN dogs but didn’t know how much work it truly is and yet how worth it every whine is as well

You never thought you’d feel so safe and so loved with someone ever again

You always thought that people come and go but your friends will always be loyal (again and again)

You never thought that you’d (really) almost never be a drinker

You never thought that peer pressure could get to you

You never thought you’d be the center of a rumor or gossip mill

Or that you’d be seen as “that girl….” (Not in the good way)

You always knew you were a homebody

You never knew at one point that’d be a great thing

You never knew what a pandemic was or that we’d ever go through one in my lifetime

You always knew you’d write a book

…..but never thought you’d be writing one about this

You never thought you’d be in so many MLMs or that you’d meet and love so many people from them

You always knew we’d stay best friends

You never thought you’d never live where you grew up

You always thought you’d find yourself by now

Guess I’m still on the journey…😄😉

What lessons or statements would you tell your younger self?

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